Day 19: We are Masters of Disguise

If you ever met me you would know that I can be very sensitive and emotional because I am easily manipulated. I have so much more bad luck than I do good luck. What makes me just a bit different is that I have developed a sense about others. You know when you have a “bad feeling” about something?  I have rarely been wrong about those feelings. However,  there are techniques used consciously and subconsciously to disguise our feelings so others are confused or unaware of what is really happening.  When I find the rare “good feeling” my experience from all the “bad feelings” get in my way and cause me to lose it. I know everyone is a Master of Disguise.  It is often difficult to find someone who isn’t wearing a mask of some kind. Instead we all hide who we are, protecting ourselves from despair and heartache. Each time I find that “good feeling” I take off my mask and face it head on but when I’m seen from behind the mask of another, the pain they are hiding from is all I am met with. Without my own disguise I am knocked back, crippled by despair and torn by heartache.  My back is riddled with wounds I let others inflict. My heart beats falsely, reminding me only of the scars that encompass it. I am done with wearing masks. I am finished with being something I am not. No longer will I blindly see others. No longer will I let others fill my life with pain. I have enough of my own despair. My mind has far too much to consider on its own, there is no available time for deciphering who is beneath the disguises. Too often I am undervalued and too often I am accepting that. There is no disguise worth having if who you are is not valued. Set yourself free and show the world what it means to express identity.

~ by Charbie on October 5, 2013.

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